They call me mellow yellow

I don't enjoy the way I feel. My fucking soul hurts. I don't feel unique in this situation. I feel like I have always been like this and there is no changing, but come to find out it was spell work. I have learned to protect myself. No longer will I accept interferace in my connections. There is one person I want to talk to and it hurts its been so long I almost forget what its like to kiss them. I want to be the shoulder they lean on and that's a issue when others are relentless with their watered down evil eye. I have been working on my soloar plexus chakra. I am no longer controlling, obsessive, and lacking in direction. I had to walk away from things that didn't sit well in my heart. Thats why I can't walk away from you. You are the best thing for me. You are my ideal mate. If you hadn't noticed I've been flirting with you. I suck at it but I want you to know i'm interested. I'm sorry I ghosted. I am coming back. I want to make a movie with you nothing pornagraphic. I just want a video of us laughing and smiling together. So i have proof of how happy you make me. I'm not turning down a chance to taste you I am just saying making a movie doesn't have to be nasty. I know it sounds abnormal, but I am driven to showing you that you are my emerald, my muse the source of my wisdom and wit.