Cancer

Why are you begging for sex? Whoever you m,essed up with wants nothing to do with you one more chance will never come again. You pretended to be more then you are. You are just fluff no substance. You tried to force a spiritual connection and you arent even intuned with the message of that connection. You need to go to therapy. Yourchildhood traumas should not be the decisionmakers in your connnections. You want someone to get in the mud with you which is normal but you want to use them to get out. Whats really sad is you are confident you will succeed. You would do better with someone you could control with YOUR money instead of using anohtersmoney and thinking you are in control. This connection you are fighting so hard for... why do you want it? You keep picking other connections which indicates its not what you keep trying to say it is. I dont know if its in your head or if you was gaslighted but there us no substance. I hear you have been crying and breaking things. Why??? This connection is equally both of your faults. You didnt get romance? Then ask for it or get it elsewhere. This person will be romantic whith the person they want to romance not just fornicate with. You may feel like they switched up but I think this person has always been brutally honest with you. n You thought if you was sweet and nice and always said yes... That you would be rewarded. Its hard to watch someone succeed without you and to watch it happen repeatedly only shows you that maybe its not them. Its to late to find out their favorite things you had plenty of time. They would have treated you like royalty but you treated them like a atm and sex toy. Looks like you should be looking for a new job and asking whomever you crossed for forgiveness. You cant do this in secret and it really is that deep. You was someones enemy and the UNIVERSE demands your apology. You have wasted to much time being like this and hiding it. The universe says own your shit before its to late.