Posts

Boom Boom Shake SDhake

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I'm feeling a little insecure right now. I don't feel like I have enough to give. I hate feeling that way. I don't know how to get past it. I tried to think about it and I keep hitting a brick wall. I want to talk to you. You have this perspective that makes everything clear. I know if I explain my past and my present you can guide me to my future. Once i have that info I will be in alignment. I know right now you don't want me in your energy. You are teaching me to take care of myself. I didn't see the real you a lot of people didnt see the real you and you have forced us all to go within and now many of us see with new eyes now. Your inner beauty blossoms out of you like a fragrant flower. I don't have to dig to see anymore you are the up to my down beat. I dream of touching you from the inside out I want to heal you. I want to be your comfort. You have given me so much and I see you are all I need and pleasing you in every way is how I will show you.

its beginning to look a lot like fyck this shyt

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Winter time a relationship will be coming to a end. Someone no longer wants to play for keeps. To many people have been involved in this situation and it had gone no where fast. These people are sending you messages trying to get your attention to get back into your energy. Just keep blocking and moving forward. Don't listen to the pleas becuase they aren't genuine. Soon as you bolster this person or people up they will abandon you again. You have torn between two groups your whole life but you was put there by people why didnt want you on either side. You was just a excuse for two or more sets of evil people to prove their dominance in a battle that didnt exist. You have become the reason you get up in the morning. You realized having a outside reason eventual fell off foryou either due to adhd or vibes.Its not perfect you still get down in the dumps and gloomy occasionally but over all you like you more and that changes so much of your life perspective. You have loved

Always learning

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Something feels off. Something feels fake. You are trusting your heart and its paying off. You have learned to hold your boundaries and now people are doing whtever they can to be in your arms friends, family and ex-lovers as well as new all justling to be safe withyou. All know being loved by you is being blessed by the Gods. Not many know how to deal with you but many are trying to study you so they can come back not all of those bold students understand you will still see right thru them so if they arent earnest no amount of learning will gain them reentry. You have learned how to put on a happy face even when the world was falling down around your ears.You have learned to see beyond the rose colored glasses of the masses. You are not returning negative energy you are just moving beyond it. You are not wasiting tears on this situation what is over and done is finito as far as you are concerned. You are 10 steps ahead of the game emotionally. Who ever is trying to put the wool

Aquarius

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 Mo3 & Kevin Gates~Broken Love (featuring Drake) Message from your person : I want to love you the right way. Mark you my way. No matter what you say I plan on staying. I will do my best to be everything you need. I can't stand against my feelings for you. I could have tried harder before, but I was emotionally lazy. I have 21 questions for you and I hope you answer honestly. I promise I have your back. How many ways can I show you I need you to have my back?    Tarot message: You and you your person are mirroring each other... Tempers on hair trigger, dwelling on sad memories... If this relationship started off amazing then became disappointing; impatience grew because things aren't happening exactly the way you wanted.  It's a good thing more time was needed. Stop trying to fit in with the masses your love story is like noone elses'. Are you willing to sacrifice who you are to fit in or are you willing to see who really is down for you. You might be getting played

I owe you a apology

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How many drinks will it take for you to sit still and let me talk to you? I have to tell you how I feel. I keep trying to talk to you thru music, but your not talking back. You are my Angel on this barren Earth. I just need a chance to show you I have changed. You won't be a secret this time. I should have never treated some of the people I wined and dinde so well they didn't deserve a quarter of the attention and affection I gave them. I surrounded myself with fake people and reaped all kinds of karma. I thought i was moving the right way. I didn't see that when my life was going well was cuz you was in my life. I thought things would be bad but once you was gone it would get 10 times worse. You was shielding me from so much karma just taking the hits and pressing forward. You accepted life unfiltered so I could wear rose ccolored glasses never turning my eye to the devastation I was leaving behind. You was the only one to call me out over and over about how I was affect

you are my bestie

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People have no idea how lucky they are to have you in their lives. I'm quitting the street life just to keep you in my life. You are my childhood sweetheaart and I can't imagine a world without you in it especially mine. If we have soul ties then call me bound. Everyone is so quick to shit on what we have, but they dont understand what we have I can't disrespect you like I do everyone else cuz your me thats why its so effortless to love you loving you is loving me. Lots of people break up and cant come back years later there is to much pain and and dead issues that there just isnt energy to unbury. Yet for us it comes down to action. Communicating is our strongest glue and I have learned to love it. 444. You don't beat around the bush with me and you rarely lie. Yeah you with hold a lot, but in your mind what is the point in telling me if I cant help why worry me and I want to say to you I want to learn to help.I appreciate you trying to keep the weight off my shoulde

I have woken up

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I love myself more when im not around you. Im am more free. Being bound is no longer comfortable for my soul. I know better now. Some people do not deserve another chance with me and I know that with comfidence now. I know i deserve better than i was recieving from those around me. I know there are people who want to come back inot my life and that is something they will have to continue to deal with alone. Its not my problem. I tried to keep the door open and they refused to walk they, but now that the door is shut they are pounding on the door. I was good to them and they didn't acknowledge me. I will learn to keep my boundaries. If they try to make me feel guilty I won't listen. I have to learn to resist the pull of false connections. I have to remeber how empty they left me feeling. Promises of celbration won't pull me in. I have seen in the past that celebratory behavior only lasts for a season then I am put away until I am needed to solve another puzzle but when

Career

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You feel like you are always cleaning up the mess left behind by your superiors. You need to be honest with yourself and admit you feel taken advantage of and underappreciated. Any kindness they show you feels false. They have no good intentions toward you or your desire to move up in the world professionally. You thought this job was going to brighten your life, but it has caused more burdens. It's like they promised all these incentives and didn't follow through with any promises. You might have been encouraged to look at your fellow employees as a family to encourage you to take on more work, but not give you financial credit for the work. You have to acknowledge your worth. You deserve better from your employer as your boss, but also as a human just existing. You built this job into your personality you loved it so much. You will hurt walking away from this position so be sure. Have a back up then go for it. You don't have to be tied to a company just because it's y

Song message

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'Are you a real freak', 'as the day goes by I'm always thinking of your face your my eve and Im your adam so lets settle down'. I'm always looking at your picture it calms my heart down. Every time the music plays I can hear your voice. 'I don't want to fall asleep cuz I miss you' and then I wake and your not there and it fucking hurts. 'I want to rock the boat wit you you make me float, you make me high.' When I get to you I expect you to back up everything you said. Can you really 'put that thang in motion' or are you just talking to entice me. I want to get you into a position where you finally let loose and show me all the hidden desires that you have buried down within. I am terrified you might just turn me away I have played so many games and I don't blame you for having animosity towards me I just hope you still have some spot in your heart for me. You are so untouchable right now and I am so angry at myself for wasting

i miss us

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I miss us being close. There are opps are spying on rotation trying to see why I want you to be mine. I have avoided you to avoid being rejected, but I am ready to be accountable. I may have over thought things but that is because I felt unlucky. Now I feel like the path is clearer and you have the nerve to be healing and dont want me around. I want to be surrounded by you. You make the past more real and the future more clear. All the trauma in my life shaped me into the person who I am, but time waits for noone and my time has been running out. The joy I get from being with you, around you keeps reminding me how beautiful life is. I want to rush in, but I have to closeout some things so there are no issues in our future. You have this steel in you that allows you to own your own shit and you heal. You have healed from your traumas and fought your demons. I hate that I fucked around and I have found out I am not happy without you. What do you want to from me because i am willi

I swear I am trying

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I've put in so much work and have nothing to show for it. At least with a job your 401k will pay out eventually. I 've been trying to stay low key but i want to play for keeps with you. Noone knows how I feel about you about us because i refuse to discuss you. I want to contact you but you have me blocked. I thought by now you would unblock me and be forgiving. I see you for who you really are when before i thought you was a totally different person. I thought walking away would make both our lives happier. I know time is up. I messed up a lot and you should've left me long ago. We were promised a lifetime ago that we werent to be togther. I want to dedicate my heart to you. I want a fufilling life you. I want to create a healthier legacay for both of our families. As frustrated I am i am so focused on you and making life what you always deserved. I want to see you soon. I want to protect you from getting hurt anymore. I know i want to dream with you and create a new

hey future mom/dad

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You have a baby waiting to be concieved. They need you to heal yourself, ground, and get back in touch with yourself so that you are a healthy enviroment for them to growth with. Your baby already loves you and wants you to be your best. You may feel healed but there is still some things you need to do some shadow work on. You kinda are stagnant right now and the level you need to be be on you aint there yet. Sometimes its not about self healing. Sometimes it really about leaning on others. You are a vibe, but right now your Spirit baby says its a killer vibe and not benficial to anyone. This child is going to have a flair for fashion and they will excude their Venus energy more than any attribute. I know right now it seems they arent on the way but the timiing isnt right. You can use tarot to talk to them. If you have been crying thinking that the baby just isnt ever gonna come you have to wait for divine timing. Do not worry about evil eyes noone will no they are coming to you

We need to talk

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I'm on my way to talk to you. I'm not trying to text you all of this. I have a lot to say and I hope you are willing to listen to me. There has been a lot of interferance in our connection and i just need to clear everything up. I hate this up hill battle i feel we have been fighting for what seems like forever. I know I act like this stuff is easy to get over but i really just bury all of it deep down. I know i should have learned from my past faster, but the lessons took me so long to understand let alone learn from. So i let all my traumas keep me trapped. I stepped beack from you because i had to see where my head was where i fit in when it comes to your life. Do i add to you or am I a burden? Being so far from you makes me wonder and fear what you are feeling about me. I try to send you good vibes because ai want you to be ok evenif i am not with you. They say the sky is the limit but if there was no sky you are my limit. I'll do what ever it takes to reach you

I want so much more for us.

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When you feel all hope is gone please look to me i want to be the Love that lifts you. You have these boundaries up and I dont know how to approach you. I've been crying a few times out loud but mostly im drowing within. I dont know how to tell you i want more when all I have been doing is showing you everything, but my love. I want long term with you, but I know I have to earn it now. Its only right that I show you I mean it. I want to see you as soon as I can. I know you dont believe me. I want to knock it out the court. I want to take you on a adventure make up for all the trips we never took. From Mexico to the windy city I want to slowly start opening your World up. I wontt use you. I want to build you up. I will do everything to make it so you wont walk away. I think right now I need to take a step back there is drama in the air. I feel like I can see clearly now I let our friends and family get our way. I know now what to prevent to keep us on a path where love liftin

Your my unspoken dream made real

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Tell me how am I supposed to breath with no air? You are the air I breath. You are my soulmate my heart. You are a boss in your own arena. You created a lane and I want to get into it with you. Everything is always fresh and new with you. You inspire me to change on the outside and inside. You are my sunrise and sunset. Right now nothing feels real without you.You look like a god/goddess and I in awe of you. You are my sun and moon and everything between. If none of that existed you would still be my king/queen. I pray for you daily though. I want you to be happy even if its not with me. IN the past I was definitely a toxic lover and things were never smooth sailing for us. I want to change your perspective so that you will give us another chance. Right now I'm trying to get my health right mentally and physically. I owe myself that before anything else but ypu are never far from my mind. I want you to think of my words and believe in me I do not want to cause pai

I'll fight any war with you

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You are in the middle of a war of those who want you to succeed and those who are praying daily that God show you that you are not all that. You arent seeing exactly what is going to end this, but you are so tired. Someone wants to know if you still want to have a relationship with them. This person doesn't have time for you at the moment and they are aware it bothers you. They know that time with you is the most important to them. They try to come to you with their truths because they have nothing else to hand you aside from their lies. This person questions why you provide a space for them in your life. The harder life is the more they feel they can trust you to support them. They have trouble sleeping because you are on their mind nightly. During the day while making money its their focus, but you stay in their thoughts never very far. This person wants to tell you that if you chose not to deal with them thats fine, but be prepared for them to be enraged because the thou

I'm freaking Miserable

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I lied. I'm sorry. How do you keep loving me? I tried to use dark magic on you. I will get therapy for us. I can help you make money. I can help build your legacy. My family keeps making fun me when it comes to love. I did't know I needed to grow up not for me not for you not for anyone.  I thought being a kid at heart meant being childlike ya know? No responsiblities or serious connections because that was for settling down and I wasnt ready for that. I am trying to be perfect for you although i know you dont need me to be.  I'm not going to lie I have been suicidal due to my overwhelming karma. I keep asking God how to make this stop but He is silent. I guess I have to do what I was supposed to do in the first plaace and dig deep to figure out why I am the way I am then figure out how to fix it. What if I cant what if I am meant to be a monster. You dont want a monster and noone else matters to me now but you so what do I do?   I promise you I truly am trying to be a bett

I got triggers

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You make me feel average. I feel so useless around you. For anyone else I can step to the plate. For you I choke every time and I want to come thur for you. I want to show you that we can make what is old new again. I have lost the love of my life. I just want to talk to you and tell you how much you mean to me. I don't want to lose that connection. I know I bring you a lot of darkness to your life and you have been holding out for a miracle. You haven't saved because you don't have faith this will occur. I am saving because I know this cant end this way. I am aware no matter how much you mean to me I have to show you not just tell you. I am not very good at leading, but I will follow your lead becuase you have found happiness in the midst of your valleys and canyons. I could study for a lifetime and I still wouldn't fathom all there is to know about you. I admit I didn't always have faith in you and your morals. I judged you based off my own promiscuous behavior. I

I try to say good bye and i choke

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Seasons change and so do connections. I want to change our connection before the next season. I wnat to go to the next stage in our lives together. I know we can heal together. Together we can overcome more obstacles vs the life we are living independantly. I feel we need to connect in a forever type of way. I see your options and I know you have choices to make. I dont want to be strung along while you figure out if you welcome me back into your life. Right now life sucks and I know it would be better if you was with me, but our seperation is necessary I need to heal. I cannot come back to you and continue to hurt you. I hate hurting you but i just keep doing it which means i need to deal with some issues. I know if i came to you that you would gladly assist because thats just how you are, but I really want to do this on my own. I need to show you I am able to handle my issues like a adult. When i come back I dont wnat to leave again. I want to heal enought I dont want t

I don't know

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I have no idea which way to go. I can't sleep. When I do see you I always feel like it's spring. Your spirit is so beautiful you had to have been here before.  I was scared to lose you and had magic used on you. I now know that from my dreams I didn't have to do that we are meant to be and I should have trusted our connection.  I know the Gods are blessing you. I am not like you. I am wicked like a Dark Fae. I know I made you feel like you had to hide parts of yourself from me. I'm so sorry love. I want to ask you what our song should be.  I know I'm trying to brush all the bad away, but it's because I am broken and I feel like I have to hide from you. I love you and I can't say it.  I'm losing you.  I don't care what anyone thinks or says I have to fight for this. Why won't you just let me love you? Why won't I let me just love you?  You are  Wonderful, empathic, intuitive, righteous, and determined. 

I'm not scared anymore...

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I'm not scared anymore. I am heading your way and I'm walking upright instead of sneaking.  I don't want to fight you anymore.  I have been putting in work, but I allowed my lust to interfere with my heart. I turned you into this warrior and I am in awe, but I am also ashamed because you shouldn't have to be so hard. I used to let anything and everything get in between us.  You are of a royal priesthood. You deserve to be with only another royal. I am taking this time to learn myself. I kept losing myself in my connections and I held on tight to my facade. I don't want to do that anymore. I won't lose myself to you or anyone else again.  My family influenced me heavily in my interactions with you. I played games with you when I should have taken you seriously. I thought with you I would lose out on growing. I thought others would lead me to my ambitions I didn't know you could teach me to reach them on my own.  I didn'

Constantly..

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Constantly you are on my mind. Like a repeating line a melody, you just can't get out your ear. I want so much and I want to say..I don't know I just know I need YOU. My life is in shambles and I feel like all I can do is ramble about what I desire. It doesn't imply you are any less it's just my heart might burst if I were to invest all I feel because it's all of me. My heart aches that I hurt you like this. Your defenses are up so high. You let me in only so much and then you pull back with fear in your eyes and though I feel surprised I know I caused those triggers. I want to make you my Janet in a Busta Rhymes Video. I want to make you soaking wet as soon as I get you in that bed. I wanna make you back up all those things you said then make you climb in ecstasy force you to gasp and then you go and spread your legs to cradle me letting me be the lead going fast then slow giving you the speed you need. I have to show you because I don't know how to tell you as

I want...

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You need loving pretty young thing. I'm watching your every move online. When we are together our souls just vibe. I want you to take everything off next time I see you. I want to give you bliss. I love that your shorter than me.  Everyone is going to hate when they see us together. We are going to be partners not enemies. I don't have to worry about you doing me wrong.  I can't stop your tears right now. I am in the middle of things I don't want you apart of. I understand how precious you are so I have to protect you.  You are my best friend, true love, adventure partner, sweetheart, partner in crime. I will love you forever. You are more than I could ever need.  I am getting better for me to be right when it's time for us. Has anyone ever told you that you are the embodiment of a god/goddess ?  I love that you rub my back when it hurts. I love that you actually want to grow old with me. No one

it's over...

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  " Baby its a shame we have to go thru this . We don't even talk girl we don't even kiss. I never thought we would be breaking up like this but its over now. " ~ 112 Someone is realizing that what they once percieved about you was wrong. This whole idea they had of who you were and what you stood for has been shifted dramatically. This change has got them questioning everything and now they want to hang out and ask you about all the things you have revealed. You have this way at looking at things that is not the other side of things, but is a balanced and rich manner and it brings abundance of self and knowledge. You also make it happen no matter how and you don't compromise yourself to do it.  You are light hearted and and you are always seking more in life. You bring life to the darkness and it doesnt want to leave.

18+ from Him

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I love watching you masturbate.  I love when you touch yourself and you say my name.  Shit is so fucking hot it makes me hard as fuck.  I am charging towards you.  I gotta get my hands on you I need to make you mine again.  I know I should be spewing love talk, but this is all lust I need to make you curl around my dick as I stroke deep in you.  I want to fuck your mouth and then I wanna make you cum in as many ways as possible. Do you orgasm from nipple play?  Well we are about to find out.  Next time I see you just start taking your clothes off I'll get the message.  Ugh I got burnt.  I didn't know.  I wouldn't have brought it to you if.... I'm not right.  I'm really fucked up right now.  If anything I'm gonna corrupt you along with burn you.  I'm so fucking rude.  You deserve better from me but I can't seem to give you that.  All I give you is tears and stress, loneliness,anger and dick.  I'm heartless so I don't feel bad,  but I know I should

I am so confused

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Your person is in deep pain and they are making really bad choices.  Looking to you to give them atonement for the chaos they are creating in their wake.  Your wavering on walking away because you don't see sunshine at the end of this storm just more gray skys.  The amount of change that has to go into making this work is staggering.  Running away will be your counterparts suggestion and yours will be to stand, but really what's best for both of you? 

Don't Bizounce

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Someone has an addiction to women.  They think women make the world just easier to live in.  Women are the spice in life.  Problem with this mindset is this person keeps entering into connections that they are implying would stay monogamous and then cheating rampantly.  There was no way this person was going to bring that you.  Not you.  Not the person they loved.  You could be on the edge of the mess, but right in the middle no they couldn't bear to see you daily knowing they was hurting you like that.  You may feel like they are choosing other connections instead of you and it's not that it's these other people make being a cheater easier.  For whatever reason it's just easier to hurt them then it is to know they are causing you intentional harm which they would never do.  Right now this person wants to touch you deeply everywhere and I mean everywhere fingers in your mouth too??? you bet!!!  They have two words for you #CreamPie you do with that as you will... They w

18+ from Her

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I crave your touch.  My ideal day is you touching me intimately all day even in front of other people some of them know and like to watch others are oblivious and it adds to the vibe.   Pull my dress up and give me a couple of strokee in the hallway ok,  bend me over the couch yes please,  shower sex yes,  kitchen sex while cooking yes,  hands in my pants with every hug  and every kiss is almost a session yes yes yes!!!!  Walk up to me pull a titty out and start sucking,  don't let me sit on your lap unless it's skin to skin .....  You have no idea how soaked id be if I never knew at what moment you was gonna take me or just tease me for a little while and that was my every day life....ummm yes please 🥺 I'll be such a good girl.  You can bind me, spank me, choke me just let me be yours all day everyday.  I want us to be sensual together I want people to see us and get aroused.  I want them to crave what we have so much that they grab their partner and start touching  and 

From a masculine to a Feminine

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I got shit to do.  I gotta focus and you are a distraction.  I never had you and now that your gone I've lost a opportunity to have you so fuck it and you!  Except you are on my mind every night, all night. I cannot even hold you while you cry in your dreams because I turned my back on you in the flesh and in the spirit world.  I was in my masculine energy and buried any trace of my feminine energy because it made me feel weak. You have always been my sunrise. You loved me at my worse. I even stopped loving me I can't understand how you do it. I know you used to ask me what I liked to see you in and it's your dresses. You seem so soft and vulnerable. I know you are not vulnerable in the least, but you just ooze feminity like Gaia in Captain Planet. When it came to you I always knew it was you. I just didn't want it to be you. If I had a better example at home maybe I would have done better by you. I hope you would have gotten a better me because I know in any universe I